Happy Halloween!

Enjoy this spooky night with three of the worst songs of the year.

The Anthem of Vampires
Bloodsuckers
Spain



Bloody Brutality
Midnight
Spain



Shine
De Toppers
Netherlands

This one may not be Halloween themed, but it’s by far the scariest of the year.

#72

The Top 100 Songs You've (Probably) Never Heard – 2009

#72
Ritam da se Ritam
Čager Zoc & Papak Dance Company
Croatia

I imagine it seemed like a good idea at the time…

#73

The Top 100 Songs You've (Probably) Never Heard – 2009

#73
Higher
Star Pilots
Sweden

Here are four reasons why this is the most totally awesome song ever:

1. It sounds like it was lifted from some 1980s summer blockbuster. If they ever made a sequel to Top Gun, this song would be on the soundtrack.

2. I can just picture the songwriters debating the first line of the refrain:
Songwriter A: “You can’t end a sentence with a preposition!”
Songwriter B: “But the line feels so empty without the ‘up’.”
Songwriter A: “Maybe we can sneak it in before the next line and no one will notice.”

3. The dancing is hilarious, especially the slow-mo bits at the bridge. Seriously, can it get any cheesier? Wait…what? Was that really the running man?!?!

4. Every time I watch this, I’m overcome with the strange desire to shout “Do a barrel roll!”

#74

The Top 100 Songs You've (Probably) Never Heard – 2009

#74
Blagoslov Za Kraj
OT Band
Serbia

There’s a lot of shouting and wailing going on here.

#75

The Top 100 Songs You've (Probably) Never Heard – 2009

#75
Two of a Kind
Espen Hana
Norway

Even though I like the pleasant 1960s vibe of this song, I can’t help but think it sounds somewhat familiar.

#76

The Top 100 Songs You've (Probably) Never Heard – 2009

#76
Probka
Intars Busulis
Latvia

Now you know how to say “traffic jam” in Russian (“probka”) and Latvian (“sastrēgums”). Hurray for learning!

#77

The Top 100 Songs You've (Probably) Never Heard – 2009

#77
You're My World
Emilia
Sweden

Breaking into the American market is incredibly difficult. This is why those who have done so before get a few extra points on this list. Emilia Rydberg had a minor hit in the US in 1999 with “Big Big World”, which reached #15 on the US ARC Weekly Top 40. For those of you who prefer the Billboard charts, it barely cracked the Hot 100 but did manage to make the Top 40 Mainstream chart. Maybe she can find success here again.

#78

The Top 100 Songs You've (Probably) Never Heard – 2009

#78
Jan Jan
Inga & Anush
Armenia

Any song with its own dance is bound for success, right?

#79

The Top 100 Songs You've (Probably) Never Heard – 2009

#79
La Teva Decisió/Get a Life
Susanne Georgi
Andorra

Just another harmless pop song… in Catalan!



Fun Fact: Susanne Georgi was one half of the duo that brought us this.

#80

The Top 100 Songs You've (Probably) Never Heard – 2009

#80
It's My Time
Jade Ewen
United Kingdom

Every now and then, something show tune-ish manages to get some radio airplay. Crafted by super-songwriting-duo Andrew Lloyd Webber (of musical theatre fame) and Diane Warren (“I Don’t Want to Miss a Thing”, “Unbreak My Heart”, “If I Could Turn Back Time”, “How Do I Live”, and many, many more), “It’s My Time” is the kind of outdated ballad built for easy listening radio.

Click here to watch the official video.

Interestingly enough, this summer it was announced that Jade has become the newest member of the Sugababes.

Bonus! Part 2

It’s that time again. Can you determine which song just missed out of being in the top 100, which never had a chance, and which fell somewhere in between?

Big Bang Baby
Claus Christensen
Denmark

Claus Christensen - Big Bang Baby

Ai-Yai
Unisex
Russia



Sila na Ljubovta
Daniel
FYR Macedonia

#81

The Top 100 Songs You've (Probably) Never Heard – 2009

#81
Lygin Ein
Kaja Halldórsdóttir
Iceland

“Lygin Ein” (Total Lie) is a song about a very angry woman spreading vicious rumors about her ex-boyfriend following their breakup. She even goes so far as to comment on the underwhelming size of a certain appendage. Is it just me, or do the best breakup songs contain venom and spite?

#82

The Top 100 Songs You've (Probably) Never Heard – 2009

#82
Dečko
Sane
Croatia

I think he really wants to be your boyfriend. Why else would he hire cheerleaders to dance behind him?

#83

The Top 100 Songs You've (Probably) Never Heard – 2009

#83
Roses
Halla Vilhjálmsdóttir
Iceland

The first of many break-up songs this year, “Roses” tells the story of a woman explaining to an ex-lover the reasons why she decided to end their relationship. It takes her a while to get to the explanation and most of the song is her beating around the bush, but eventually we learn that she sent all of those roses back because she just never loved the sender.

#84

The Top 100 Songs You've (Probably) Never Heard – 2009

#84
Do It Again
Foxy
Norway

When performing a song with a repeated phrase, it’s important to know the number of times you’ll sing it. That’s why it is a good idea to keep track by counting on one’s fingers. If you can incorporate this into the choreography, that’s even better.

#85

The Top 100 Songs You've (Probably) Never Heard – 2009

#85
Love
Sasha Son
Lithuania

Sasha Son had his first huge hit at the age of 12. Fourteen years later, he was chosen to represent his native Lithuania with the somewhat pretentious “Love”, a song about, well… love. In fact, the word love appears in the lyrics of the English version a whopping 54 lovely times. This is more love than previous record holder “Love?” (Ireland’s not-so-lovely entry in 2005). Interestingly enough, in the original Lithuanian version “Pasiklydęs žmogus” (The Lost Man), “love” appears only once.

#86

The Top 100 Songs You've (Probably) Never Heard – 2009

#86
Party
KeSera feat. Anita Hegerland
Norway

Admittedly, I find this song unintentionally hilarious, but it’s still the kind of stuff you’d expect to hear on top 40 radio.

#87

The Top 100 Songs You've (Probably) Never Heard – 2009

#87
Mamo
Anastasiya Prikhodko
Russia

Next, we have a rather moody piece from Russia. “Мамо” (Mom) is an emotionally charged rant to a mother about the difficult nature of love. It includes lyrics like this:

“I will throw away my dream and crush it on the floor
How you've broken my destiny and left it on the side
I will pour out girl's tears like rain.”

How dramatic.

#88

The Top 100 Songs You've (Probably) Never Heard – 2009

#88
What if We
Chiara
Malta

Fun Fact: You can tell this song is a big ballad because the video features scenes from the recording studio/poorly lit basement.
I like Malta, but sometimes I can’t help but wonder if they think it’s 1998.

#89

The Top 100 Songs You've (Probably) Never Heard – 2009

#89
Vornótt
Hreindís Ylva Garðarsdóttir Holm
Iceland

Is it just me, or does this song sound like it could be on The Nightmare Before Christmas soundtrack? (The music starts at 1:50)

#90

The Top 100 Songs You've (Probably) Never Heard – 2009

#90
7 Days
Corbus Albus
Moldova

Armed with a band name that sounds like a character from the Harry Potter books (or is bad Latin for white basket), Corbus Albus seizes the 90th position on this countdown with the song “7 Days”. She walks rather slowly, doesn’t she?

Bonus!

Every so often during this year’s countdown, I’ll post a few songs that failed to make the list. In each set of three, one barely missed the cut, another was nowhere close to the top 100, and the third falls somewhere in between. See if you can figure out which song falls in each category.

Never, Never
Princessa Avenue
Russia



Beauty Saves the World
NikitA
Ukraine



Nelikümmend
Chalice
Estonia

#91

The Top 100 Songs You've (Probably) Never Heard – 2009

#91
Like an Angel
Julius Winger
Norway

Admittedly, this song is very forgettable. I guess I’m just having a very pro-Norway year. The performance starts at 0:44.

#92

The Top 100 Songs You've (Probably) Never Heard – 2009

#92
Fósturjörð
Páll Rósinkrans
Iceland

“Fósturjörð” (Motherland) is a moody ballad performed by Al Gore. Oh…nevermind.

You can see the video by clicking here.

#93

The Top 100 Songs You've (Probably) Never Heard – 2009

#93
Una Chica Normal
Biquini
Spain

Here’s something cute and bubbly to brighten your day.

#94

The Top 100 Songs You've (Probably) Never Heard – 2009

#94
Like You Did (Yesterday)
Janni Santillan
Norway

This song is decent but goes nowhere. It’s the kind of track that you’d expect to maybe crack the top 50 before falling off the face of the earth into obscurity (a.k.a. adult-contemporary radio).

#95

The Top 100 Songs You've (Probably) Never Heard – 2009

#95
La Noche es Para Mí
Soraya
Spain

Many readers have previously stated that they love Spanish pop. Well, I listened. “La Noche es Para Mi” is standard Spanish fare and sounds like its ten years old, but one could see it becoming a throwaway summer hit.



This is the official video as posted on YouTube by RTVE and therefore is the only one available for embedding. It includes subtitles and advertisements. Sorry.

#96

The Top 100 Songs You've (Probably) Never Heard – 2009

#96
The Balkan Girls
Elena Gheorghe
Romania

Did you know the Balkan Girls, they like to party like nobody…like nobody? I’ll always remember this song as the one that failed to live up to its lyrical potential. It could have been a deep, introspective look at the life of someone who parties constantly (“I wonder if beyond this there could be something better”), but instead, this thought is quickly dismissed and the song devolves into a banal whoo girl anthem.



Why are they riding horses?

#97

The Top 100 Songs You've (Probably) Never Heard – 2009

#97
There Must Be Another Way
Noa & Mira Awad
Israel

It’s hard to believe that a song about peace would stir up so much controversy, but that’s exactly what the song at #97 did earlier this year. “There Must Be Another Way” is a duet performed in English, Hebrew, and Arabic by Israeli singer Noa and Israeli Arab actress Mira Awad. Growing tensions in the months leading up to Eurovision between Israel and its neighbors were reflected in the controversy surrounding the Israeli entry. Members of the Israeli Arab community called the song propaganda while some of Israel’s far left thought the song was hypocritical and did not accurately reflect the state of modern Israel. It’s all kinda depressing to think about.

#98

The Top 100 Songs You've (Probably) Never Heard – 2009

#98
We Don't Wanna Put In
Stephane & 3G
Georgia

It’s not the greatest song and disco has been dead for decades, but, as we all know, controversy sells and this song has it in spades. “We Don’t Wanna Put In” was chosen to be the Georgian entry at this year’s Eurovision Song Contest in Moscow, but 2 months before the contest, the song was declared unsuitable to compete due to its political nature. You see, “We don’t wanna put in” sounds a lot like “We don’t want a Putin” (Russia’s controversial prime minister; remember, this was 6 months after the outbreak of the South Ossetia War). The controversy soon became an international news story (even in the US) and the group would have gone on to sell millions of singles, if only they had released the song abroad.

#99

The Top 100 Songs You've (Probably) Never Heard – 2009

#99
El Patito
Carlos Ferrer EAI
Spain

I know that many of my readers were confused by the last post. “Why didn’t we start this year’s list with a novelty song, as is tradition?” they asked. “Well,” I responded, “change is good.” But, to keep everyone happy, I present to you, the first novelty song of the year.

#100

The Top 100 Songs You've (Probably) Never Heard – 2009

It’s that time of year again! It seems like the summer flew by and autumn is knocking on our door with a new Top 100 list in tow. I’m sure you know the rules by now, but if you forgot, here is a brief reminder. Every year, we count down the top 100 Eurovision-related songs (songs that competed in the Eurovision Song Contest or competed to compete in the ESC). Unlike the hundreds of other fan blogs, the songs in this list are ranked using a complex mathematical formula that examines a song’s quality and, most importantly, its potential for success outside of Europe (i.e. mostly North America).
This year’s list was whittled down from over 600 songs from 43 countries, 35 of which placed at least one song in the top 100. Astute readers may notice that this is down from last year’s high of 36 countries. In fact, many will be surprised that a few nations that have previously found much success on past lists are absent from this one. How exciting. Now, onto the list…

#100
Miss Kiss Kiss Bang
Alex Swings, Oscar Sings
Germany

Germany’s only eligible entry places in the hundredth spot mostly because it’s Germany’s only eligible entry. That being said, it is a fun, pseudo-swing ditty with a shot at success stateside. Why, you ask; simply because it was featured on Oprah last spring. If the big O had told her 7 million strong audience to buy this single, you’d be watching this year’s #1 instead of #100.